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Why I Think Stephen King Once Lived in Our Apartment

I’ve been a bad blogger.

I swear, this happens every time we move. Whatever ability I have to multitask gets tossed out the window. I think the last time I posted anything was almost two weeks ago, and my friendKevin’s had a guest post waiting patiently for just as long. It’s going to have to wait one more day, however, as I thought it would be lame to redeem myself with someone else’s words.

I’m about to end my hiatus with a little hippie ju-ju.

Have you heard of the term, ‘excessive signifier?’ I had a professor in college use it in reference to Steven King’s The Shining. The Overlook Hotel, he said, acted as an excessive signifier.

Okay, hold on for just a second here. I need to throw in a disclaimer. It’s been almost 4 years since I sat in a classroom (Holy crap, is that right? Yikes.), and I can’t be totally sure that I’m using this term correctly. After a few minutes of looking it up on the internet, I decided to just write it as I remember it and accept any advice or criticisms if I screw it up.

Aaaaanyway, what I remember is that an excessive signifier is something that takes certain underlying, possibly dormant qualities in people, and amplifies them, well, excessively.

So.

The Overlook Hotel, according to my professor, took Jack Torrance’s negative, quietly lurking personality traits and amplified them, causing him to go on a psychotic, family-murdering rampage. He didn’t actually murder his family, but he sure put a serious amount of effort into his attempts.

Our old apartment was kind of like that.

Paul didn’t start seeing topiary animals come to life, and our cupboards didn’t fill to the brims with booze or anything, but that apartment sure was good at bringing out our negative qualities. The slightest bit of stress would put us all in a snappish, pissy mood, and a sink full of dishes could throw me into a sighing and whining rampage.

Where’s the hippie ju-ju, you ask? Don’t worry, I’ve got it right here.

After this move, I’m totally convinced that homes (and a bajillion other things) contain energy. Sometimes it’s good energy, and sometimes it soul-sucking, motivation-draining, negative energy. That was the case in our last apartment.

Before we moved there, Paul and I were jogging every other day. We were budgeting machines, and we had, at the very least, a wee bit of structure we could grasp onto in order to keep us organized.

As soon as we moved into The Bad Place, our exercising stopped. I lost my ability to wake up with Paul and slept in almost every morning. I had no place to work, and you could see the dirty dishes from almost any vantage point in the whole apartment. It had a total of two windows, and the ugliest brown carpet you’ve ever seen. I was disappointed almost every time I opened the door to come home.

Now, I know I wrote a post about taking what you have and turning into something you love. I had big plans for that place…and they just never happened. Remember the excessive signifier? Some of my demons involve staying motivated and sticking to projects that I start. That place found those lazy demons and scattered them about, letting them soak right down to the base of that poop-brown carpet.

Suddenly, however, we had a breakthrough and ended up moving out. We’ve now got a beautiful apartment in Omaha, that even has an extra room for Charlie’s toys. I’ll definitely be posting more about our new home in the near future.

This brings me to a question, and I’d really appreciate some input.

We were lucky. If Paul wouldn’t have gotten this teaching opportunity, we’d still be in that apartment with all those demons. How can we prepare ourselves for negative energy like that? I refuse to believe that we have to succumb to our surroundings, and I’m asking you guys to help me with an escape plan. I’ll take whatever answers you’ve got, whether they’re purely logical or chock-full of hippies.

Do any of you live in a place that just brings you down? Have you in the past? What do you do to overcome those feelings, and how did they work?

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The Local Awesome: Blue House Fotos

Oh, hey, remember that time I made a big ole hullaballoo about my fantastic pictures?

Oh yeah, and then I kind of went off the map for a week?

Yeah…Well, better late than never, right?

Now, as much as we all love self-taken photos that have been edited on Picnik (in order to pretend that my camera/skills aren’t terrible), I thought it was time to throw a little Pro in the mix.

Sometimes, choosing a professional can be a tough job. For this situation, however, Rutheah from Blue House Fotos was a…what do you call it?

Oh, yeah. NO BRAINER.

Rutheah is fabulous. She’s based out of Kearney, NE, where she resides with her husband, adorable munchkins, and munchkin-to-be. Rutheah specializes in on-location, natural-light photography. And she is skilled. She should also be honored to be my very first non-food related Local Awesome. That’s how much I recommend this lady.

So, in typical Local Awesome style, I asked her some questions. Warning: She’s allergic to capital letters, and in this particular instance, I find it adorable. I hope you’ll forgive me if I just scatter the fabulous pictures willy-nilly throughout this post. Cuz’ that’s what’s going to happen.

Me: So, Rutheah, how long have you been interested in photography?
Ru: loved photography since my early teens. my father is an avid photographer and used to take my sister and i to the dark room and taught us how to develop photos the old fashioned way. i remember one summer in particular, when dad let my sister and i take his fancy cameras and shoot whatever we wanted. then we got to process the photos ourselves. it was such an experience. that was when my interest was sparked.

Me: I know that you attended a workshop this summer, to help fine-tune your skillz. How was that?
Ru: the workshop i went to was awesome! its intention was to teach people with dslrcameras exactly how to shoot in manual. it was with a photographer and mommy blogger i highly respect. i learned how to use my camera better; with all those fancy buttons, now i know exactly which ones to use. it’s nice to have full control over my camera and to be able to use it as a tool.

Me: What is it that you love so much about taking photos?
Ru: i love everything. i love the sound the shutter makes. i love capturing little moments that would otherwise vanish if they weren’t photographed. i love photography because it makes me see things from new perspectives. i will always be learning new things and growing in my “style” which is neato. and most of all i love that i can do something that brings joy to others.

With as many pictures as I’m posting, I don’t think I should type much more. Since the photos totally speak for themselves, I’ve got no problem shutting up.

However, I have to say this: Run. Run screaming with glee to Blue House Fotos’ webpage.It’s the whole package: Website, Blog, and Facebook page. Trust me on this one. If you live in Central Nebraska and need some beautiful pictures taken, Blue House Fotos will be the best decision you’ve made in a long time.

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Movin’ and Shakin’ . . . Again.

Have you ever been on the brink of a huge life-change? I mean, like, a complete and total life-180?

Holy crap.

Things are about to get seriously different for the Bonk family.

Let me give you a little run-down of how life has been for the past year or so.

I’ve been staying home with Charlie, and in November I began working from home. One of my main sources of ‘frazzle’ has been trying to balance work, baby, and cleaning. Something always suffers. If I have a super-productive day, get a couple blog posts written in advance, and get in some good quality play-time with Charlie, the house looks like a hurricane went through it. If the house is clean, I’m usually about 2 blog posts behind, and Charlie’s watched a decent amount of Curious George.

Sometimes I feel like I’m losing my mind.

HOWEVER. Do I love hanging out with Charlie? Duh. Do I love blogging? Of course. Do I love cleaning? Not so much…but with the right music and a happy little dude, sometimes cleaning can be fun.

Now Paul. Paul has been working for a student-loan company for a year. Is that what his college degree is in? Nope. Did he love his job…at all? Nope. Did he feel fulfilled and challenged? Nope, nope, nope.

Well, friends, we’ve got a newsflash. Paul got accepted to Graduate School. Now, I don’t know if you read last week’s guest post, but choosing to go back to school can come with a lot of stress… In our case, we’ve got to get all moved by August 8th, take a serious look at re-defining our budget, and find someone to pick up the lease on our current apartment.

On a side note, if you know of someone in the Lincoln area who needs a 1 bedroom apartment with low rent and close proximity to coffee, ice cream, and donuts, send me an email.

What all of this means is that our lives are going to change. Drastically. Paul will not only be going to school, but will also start teaching college-level Algebra classes.

That’s right, I’m married to a totally handsome Graduate Teaching Assistant in the Mathematics Department. Oh, yeah.

Our schedule is going to be completely different. I’m hoping I’ll get more time to focus on my business (before all you grad students out there start assaulting me with “Oh, you have NO IDEA how busy Paul’s going to be,” I’m just saying that his schedule’s going to be slightly more flexible than a straight-up 8-5.) and maybe make some more money for the family. To be completely honest, though, I’ve got no idea what our lives are going to be like in a mere matter of weeks. That’s a pretty frazzly thing for me to think about.

You know what’s not frazzly, though? Knowing my husband is going to feel challenged, fulfilled, and happy with what he’s doing every day. That’s the big pay-off.

So, no, I don’t have a Monday Guest Post…and I’ve got, literally, 3 Local Awesomes waiting to be posted, and a bunch of fabulous pictures to show off. I hope you guys will bear with me these next couple of weeks, as things are going to be pretty hectic.

Hugs, prayers, and high-fives will be greatly appreciated.

Oh, and chocolate. Chocolate is always good.

P.S. It’s my dad’s birthday. You should sing to him. Happy Birthday, Daddio!

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A Guest Post about Big Decisions

We’re adults. We’re perfectly comfortable with where we are in our lives, and never have yearnings to be walking a different path. We’ve paid our adolescent, insecure dues and will never be unsure again. Right?
Psssshhhhh!
If you believe that, I’ve got a baby polar bear I need you to watch while I go yachting around Figi next week.

Life brings change, and change brings forth some insecurity. Our guest-post this week comes from Danell Will, a blogging mom with logic in her brain and hippie in her blood… She’s just made a pretty big decision, and I think we can all relate to her feelings.

Life is full of twists and turns, bends in the road, and mountains and valleys. Life is also full of crossroads, which is where I believe real, hard and crazy life-changing decisions are made. If you’ve found yourself at a crossroads recently, you might have experienced some of these common, yet uncomfortable (and uncomforting) symptoms:
-Sweaty palms
-Increased heart rate
-Dry mouth
-Inability to focus
-Insomnia

For some, the tell-tale “crossroad symptoms” might begin to occur when they are deciding to get married, move, change jobs, or to sell everything and become a hippie living off the land. Although my crossroad might not be as exciting as growing dreadlocks and forgoing daily showers, mine is ultimately a game-changer: going back to school.
That’s right. I said it. Going. Back. To. School.

I graduated 2 ½ years ago with a BA (which I’d like to stand for “Bad Ass”… but sadly, it does not) and always figured I’d eventually get my Masters. However, at the time I had no freaking idea what I wanted to do (yup, I was one of those college graduates), so I decided to take a little time and live life outside of the academic world, which apparently meant having a baby, buying a house, and becoming a full-fledged adult. It was right in the middle of all of this “becoming an adult” stuff that I began to really consider what I wanted to be “when I grow up.”

About 6 to 7 months ago, the light bulb finally came on and I realized that God was nudging me to go back to school and become a counselor. This light bulb initiated a whirlwind of contemplating, questioning, worrying…etc. You see, going back to school for some 25-year-olds might not be that big of a decision, but when you have a full-time job, a marriage to keep intact (and happy) and a child to raise, the decision becomes a lot more important. It becomes even more important when you realize the program you are looking into has just changed from a 2 year program to a 4 year program which means it will take at least 5 years to complete at part-time status. That’s a lot of time and energy to devote to something, especially something so freaking expensive.

So, there I was… at my crossroads with the sweaty palms and a heart that was beating so fast I thought it was going to jump out of my chest. If I turned left, I would choose the path I could clearly see down, a path that would consist of a life I’m already well-aware of – routine, structure, happiness and monotony. If I turned right, I would walk onto the path that had tree branches in the way, possibly a cliff or two, but also the possibility of excitement, challenges, changes, and an undefined future.

I’ve always believed that some of the hardest things in life are the most rewarding, so I took my 1st step and turned right – I wrote my 4 essays, begged my 3 references, tailored my resume, paid my money, took part in a 4 hour group interview and now I’m currently awaiting a big, fat acceptance letter (fingers crossed). Am I scared? HELL YES. If I do get in, there is still the question of how it’s going to be paid for, how I’m going to manage my home life and my academic one, how I’m going to survive 5 more years of school. But I chose my path, and now I gotta walk it (or stumble on it)… how freaking exciting is that?!

So, Dear Reader, what is your crossroads? Whatever it may be, don’t just stand there looking at the sign forever. Pick left or right, A or B, yes or no… JUST CHOOSE, because when you make that choice, that’s where the real adventure begins.