The Fam

It can be awfully easy to get all selfish and self-pitying, can’t it?

No one understands what you’re going through . . . you’re somehow busier than everyone else . . . everyone gets what they want and you’re the only one who has to make sacrifices . . . right?

Blech. I hate feeling that way, and what makes it worse is knowing that the only thing that’s going to make anything better is me changing my attitude.

Now, this post is not meant to be an advertisement for birth control, but having two kids is hard. There might be some super-moms out there shaking their heads at me, but that’s fine. They can just watch smugly as their two-year-olds rub their feet and wash the dishes and shake their heads right on out of here.

The other day, Paul made some joke about hiring a nanny and I actually said something totally serious like “I just don’t think we’d be able to afford that.”

Do I actually want a nanny? No; I love staying at home and being a mom. Would I like to poop by myself every once in awhile? Yes, actually, yes I would. If we were bathing in money, I would pay someone to hang out with the kids for two hours, three days a week. I honestly would. I could get some work done, shower, blog, re-watch all six available seasons of Doctor Who on Netflix . . . whatever. I know that some people might call that “pre-school,” but, again, if someone can provide me with a bathtub full of money, I’d be all over it.

Here’s the dealio, yo’s: this is what we’ve got. This is the path we’ve chosen, and I think we all know that pretty much every path has its bumpy patches. Sure, I’ve been basically attached to the same little person for six weeks now, which means I’ve been completely alone for a total of . . . I’m going to say . . . four hours in the past month and a half. But, really, that’s okay, because now she’s started smiling real, non-gas-induced smiles and still does that awesome full-body baby butt-stretch, which is one of the cutest things in the world.

Sure, Charlie is going through what seems like a never-ending pants-peeing stage . . . but after he pees his pants he’ll smile and do this wiggly noodle dance and run away in order to diffuse the situation.

How . . . I mean, really, how do you even react to that? If you’ve never gone from seeing-red-pissed to almost-pee-your-own-pants-laughing in .06 seconds, babysit a toddler with potty-training regression. Looking for a trial subject? Have your people call my people.

Remember when you and your husband used to have all the time in the world to hang out with each other, go grab a drink, or even talk for more than five minutes without either a) hearing someone scream “You count to ten!” or b) falling asleep?

I vaguely do. Vaguely.

Back when we had that freedom, though, we had no idea what it was like to look at our two kick-ass/exhausting children and feel what it’s like to be that in love with that many people.

Right now, those quiet moments may be rarer than the frustrating, pee-and-puke ones, but, again, that’s what we’ve got. No one’s going to make me love my life but me, and the more time I spend feeling all “waaaaah, waaaah, waah” the less time I’m going to have to enjoy it.

So there, Self. Enjoy your 25 minutes of sleeping baby time and have another cup of coffee.

It’s the final countdown, friends. In less than 24 hours, we’ll have a 4th Musketeer to add to our little family.

I know it’s ridiculous, but I woke up this morning feeling pretty emotional about the fact that the era of “the three of us” is coming to an end. I know that adding a new Bonk is going to be wonderful, and I have no idea how awesome this new era is going to be . . . but I don’t ever want to forget the special almost-three years that Paul, Charlie, and I have had together.

Here’s to new adventures! Wishes of goodwill are always appreciated! 🙂

Up until about Tuesday of last week, both Paul and I had completely forgotten about Fall Break. There was almost no anticipation, no waiting for the break. It was more like, “Hey, Merry Christmas! You get a four-day weekend that you absolutely weren’t expecting! Enjoy!”

Fall Break came at just the right time. I think we were all getting a little bogged-down, and we were in serious need of some family/friends time. I got to go out on Friday night with my friends for an evening of Karaoke, and that was something I hadn’t done in months. My feet were sore and my calves were the size of Christmas hams by the time the night was over, but it was worth it. I had a great time.

The rest of the break was filled with a zoo trip, a mind-blowingly pleasant visit to the pediatrician, ice cream, and a quiet trek to the pumpkin patch.

Guys, I’ve just got to tell you about this pumpkin patch. Somebody tipped me off about it in a Facebook mom’s group, and it was pretty much perfect for me. Notice I said “me.” I’m sure that Charlie would have had a blast at Vala’s, especially now that he’s old enough to appreciate it, but that is just not my kind of scene. I’m sure there are people who find enjoyment in going to Vala’s, and maybe our mid-October, Sunday afternoon trip last year was part of the reason I got all stressed out, but it’s just too overwhelming for me. We were surrounded by what felt like 5 million people, everything cost money (in addition to an admission fee), and Charlie was just a bit too little. He wanted to run everywhere and really had no interest in focusing on any of the attractions. Don’t get me wrong; I loved hanging out with our family and I appreciated the outing, but that stuff can get stressful for me. Maybe if we went in the middle of the week when most kids are in school, I would be able to relax and really enjoy it. Anybody know if it’s calmer during the week?

Anyway, this little pumpkin patch has no name, and can be found south of the intersection of 120th and Military in Omaha. The little itty-bitty pumpkins were free, and none of the other pumpkins cost more than $1.50. There was no admission fee, a nice piece of playground equipment, and there were never more than 9 people there the entire time. We got a few cute pictures of Charlie, and a wheelbarrow full of cheap pumpkins. I can’t remember the exact date that the owner opens up the pumpkin patch, but it’s sometime in mid-September. She sells pumpkins till Halloween or when she runs out, and I’m really excited for us to go a little earlier next year, so the pumpkins aren’t so picked-over.

This really was an awesome break, and although I’m sad to see it go, I feel like it did what it promised: Gave us a break. We didn’t travel anywhere, and spent almost all of it together. I now feel like I can make it to Thanksgiving break while keeping my sanity, and I’m super-happy that we got so much family time.

Now, can my Christmas-Ham-calves keep me upright until Thanksgiving? I’ll have to get back to you on that.

So . . . guess what hasn’t been so bad?

Potty training.

Seriously. It’s almost been a non-event. I think we mostly have the “Naked Summer” to thank for that. My parents’ house is two miles out of town in western Nebraska, and they don’t have too many neighbors . . . and the neighbors they do have aren’t phased by a toddler running around naked for two months straight.

I should probably stop here and warn my readers that I’m about to talk about my toddler’s urination habits. If this is not your kind of reading material, you should probably go watch this instead, because it totally blew my mind and has nothing to do with pee. Have a good day.

I have a friend who had great success with the no pants/total nudity potty training approach, and I think this was just the freer, more natural, frolic-through-the-meadows-version of that.
At Mom and Dad’s, Charlie was naked pretty much the entire time. He would just refuse to keep his clothes on. After all, the dogs don’t have to wear clothes, right? At some point, though, he started running to the bathroom and sitting on the toilet when he had to take care of business.

I couldn’t believe it. Sometimes, I’d look up from my book and realize that he wasn’t playing with his toys anymore. He’d just vanish and I’d look all over, only to find he had climbed on the toilet and was doing his thing.

Now, if he was outside playing with the dogs . . . that was an entirely different situation. Let’s just say that Nature dictated Charlie’s peeing habits when he was under the open sky.

When we moved into the new house, things regressed a little bit, and every once in a while I’d realize that the soothing “running water” sound I was hearing was, in fact, not a cute little zen-pool, but Charlie peeing behind the couch or under the kitchen table. That was not so awesome.

Eventually, though, Charlie’s urge to strip all of his clothing lessened slightly (thank you, Fall) and the discomfort of peeing into his underwear and pants helped him understand the term “accident” a little better. Accidents still happen every once in a while around here, but it’s usually when we’re having too much fun or we just didn’t quite make it to the toilet.

One of the best decisions we’ve made when it comes to potty training is switching to cloth pull-ups. We still use our cloth diapers at night and regular underwear when we’re at home during the day. When we go out, however, we’ve started using cloth pull-ups, or “trainers.” These have just worked so well. We hit the jackpot when we heard about a local sale called“Fluff Again.” It’s basically a giant used cloth diaper consignment sale, with a few local vendors and businesses selling their wares.

Now, while some of you might be horrified at the thought of using used cloth diapers, let me just say that A) being poor, and B) using cloth diapers in the first place tends to make certain “icky” things a lot less icky. Rather than spending $15.95 on one pair of trainers, we spent $3.50. Then we washed them . . . and then we put them on Charlie . . . and it’s totally fine. He has not contracted any cooties that I can detect.

We bought about 5 pairs that were a mix of Blueberry Trainers, Fuzzibunz’ Trickle Free Trainers, and some random ones that didn’t have a brand on them. I like the Blueberries the best, but if I’m being honest it’s simply because they’re cuter. We’re happy with all of them and haven’t seemed to need more than 5 (insert happy dance inspired by the fact that we have our own washer and dryer now).

Whoah. This post turned out to be a little long-winded. Summary: I think our experience has gone so well because we let Charlie decide when he was ready. I realize not everyone has the opportunity to be at home with their kids all day, so that’s easier said than done. I’m also fully aware that when I have the new baby there’s a good chance of Charlie peeing in corners again, so I’m trying not to sound too smug. Also, cloth trainers are awesome, especially when you pay less than 4 bucks a pop.

Finally, tiny little boy briefs are freaking adorable. That is all.