We’re adults. We’re perfectly comfortable with where we are in our lives, and never have yearnings to be walking a different path. We’ve paid our adolescent, insecure dues and will never be unsure again. Right?
Psssshhhhh!
If you believe that, I’ve got a baby polar bear I need you to watch while I go yachting around Figi next week.
Life brings change, and change brings forth some insecurity. Our guest-post this week comes from Danell Will, a blogging mom with logic in her brain and hippie in her blood… She’s just made a pretty big decision, and I think we can all relate to her feelings.
Life is full of twists and turns, bends in the road, and mountains and valleys. Life is also full of crossroads, which is where I believe real, hard and crazy life-changing decisions are made. If you’ve found yourself at a crossroads recently, you might have experienced some of these common, yet uncomfortable (and uncomforting) symptoms:
-Sweaty palms
-Increased heart rate
-Dry mouth
-Inability to focus
-Insomnia
For some, the tell-tale “crossroad symptoms” might begin to occur when they are deciding to get married, move, change jobs, or to sell everything and become a hippie living off the land. Although my crossroad might not be as exciting as growing dreadlocks and forgoing daily showers, mine is ultimately a game-changer: going back to school.
That’s right. I said it. Going. Back. To. School.
I graduated 2 ½ years ago with a BA (which I’d like to stand for “Bad Ass”… but sadly, it does not) and always figured I’d eventually get my Masters. However, at the time I had no freaking idea what I wanted to do (yup, I was one of those college graduates), so I decided to take a little time and live life outside of the academic world, which apparently meant having a baby, buying a house, and becoming a full-fledged adult. It was right in the middle of all of this “becoming an adult” stuff that I began to really consider what I wanted to be “when I grow up.”
About 6 to 7 months ago, the light bulb finally came on and I realized that God was nudging me to go back to school and become a counselor. This light bulb initiated a whirlwind of contemplating, questioning, worrying…etc. You see, going back to school for some 25-year-olds might not be that big of a decision, but when you have a full-time job, a marriage to keep intact (and happy) and a child to raise, the decision becomes a lot more important. It becomes even more important when you realize the program you are looking into has just changed from a 2 year program to a 4 year program which means it will take at least 5 years to complete at part-time status. That’s a lot of time and energy to devote to something, especially something so freaking expensive.
So, there I was… at my crossroads with the sweaty palms and a heart that was beating so fast I thought it was going to jump out of my chest. If I turned left, I would choose the path I could clearly see down, a path that would consist of a life I’m already well-aware of – routine, structure, happiness and monotony. If I turned right, I would walk onto the path that had tree branches in the way, possibly a cliff or two, but also the possibility of excitement, challenges, changes, and an undefined future.
I’ve always believed that some of the hardest things in life are the most rewarding, so I took my 1st step and turned right – I wrote my 4 essays, begged my 3 references, tailored my resume, paid my money, took part in a 4 hour group interview and now I’m currently awaiting a big, fat acceptance letter (fingers crossed). Am I scared? HELL YES. If I do get in, there is still the question of how it’s going to be paid for, how I’m going to manage my home life and my academic one, how I’m going to survive 5 more years of school. But I chose my path, and now I gotta walk it (or stumble on it)… how freaking exciting is that?!
So, Dear Reader, what is your crossroads? Whatever it may be, don’t just stand there looking at the sign forever. Pick left or right, A or B, yes or no… JUST CHOOSE, because when you make that choice, that’s where the real adventure begins.